Who am I?
In 2000 I got rid of my television. In 2016 I got rid of my Facebook account.
If I am not defined by what they tell me, then who am I?
If I am not the product of all that I read or take in from other people then who am I to think the thoughts I think?
If I, connecting only with myself, my source, my feelings, my intuition, my integrity, am just that… what does that make me?
Often I feel like a stranger in a world that somehow I find myself skating alongside of, somehow not a part of, yet in other ways completely immersed in. It’s a strange sensation.
Who does that make me? Perhaps more importantly, who does that make you?
My thoughts are (mostly) (I’m bring very liberal with the mostly here) independent and free of other peoples assumptions and judgments and feelings, does that make them more real than yours? Yes, I’m talking to you. The you that is you. The you that if you are quiet has things to say to you. Are you listening?
If we are not being fed information from all of the media outlets and instead feel only what is coursing through our bodies. The anger that wells the fear that crumbles. The anxiety and the desire for something more, something different. If we aren’t fed that imitation feeling…then who are we then? Do we look, feel, smell, act differently than we do right now? In this moment?
Who am I if I’m not defined by social media? Who are you?
Who am I if my thoughts are not informed by those who tell the “news.”
Who are we now? Right now.
I’m sitting a lot and asking this question. Who am I?
Who am I?
Who am I really?
Because I think we should be right now. Who are we? Who do we want to be? And more importantly where are we going?
I am deeply troubled by how I feel these days in the privacy of my meditation space. When I don’t have patients to distract me from myself. When I have finished cleaning and reorganizing and hiding myself from myself. Then I sit and ask this very simple question, “Who am I? ”
So far there is silence.
What does that mean? It means everything is changing. Everything. What once I thought I knew is no longer. What once we all thought we knew is no longer. The rules have changed. Reality has changed. And now we are at the beginning, at the beginning of change where it’s the most Rocky and unstable and unsure. Where it hurts the most. This is the time to really figure out who we are and what we want.
Who are you?
Who are you really?
I’m still trying to figure it all out myself. I don’t expect you to have an answer. But if you do, I would ask you to ask again. And sit still and really wait to hear the answer.
This is the age of Aquarius right? Well, from this Aquarian I implore you to find out the meaning of your existence. In each breath. In each moment. How do you become more present so you can create the next step with as much attention as you can muster. The time for knowing what’s going to happen is over. Nothing is written. Nothing is certain. Not even what you think you know.
Now is the time for being in the present moment and taking one committed step after another. One purposeful step after another. One mindful present moment leads to the next space of mindful presence.
That’s where you will find me anyway.
That’s where I want to be.
Writing the future with my breath. With the beat of my heart. With the strength of my integrity. With space for everyone. With love coursing through me. With the belief of possibility beyond my wildest dreams. With truth. With Justice. And with hope that each breath of love breathes light into another.